New love, and new hope.
This feeling grows inside of me.
Hearing a heartbeat, growing a tiny life.
This miracle is happening everyday.
My stomach grows, and so does my heart.
I wait for that day when I get to see your face little love,
And know that you are a creation of our love.
I wait to see your tiny hands, and feet.
I wonder who youll look like,
Whose smile youll have, who little nose youll wrinkle.
We wait to welcome you to the world.
And I will hope that everyday you know that you are wanted and loved.
Tears fall so often from eyes of happy lovers.
Why?
because with a fogged heart we think to quickly or not enough.
We rely on our partner to help us through when we should equally support the relationship.
Love needs to come back,
it needs to flourish in the hearts that once danced with the flame of love.
Come back to these eyes so that the emptiness is consumed.
Let love dwell where hearts lie somber,
and let the tears of happiness again resided in there rightful place.
Just come back.
Too Hard to Live Your Own Life by mi-alo-hem-va, literature
Literature
Too Hard to Live Your Own Life
When life's too hard and helps too far away....
count on yourself to make it ok.
Don't think of the bad and how hard it is,
think about the people who need you to live.
Even when it's all gone wrong there's always someone to hold you up and help you stay strong.
Pick up a ball, a bat a pen, take out your frustration on the paper instead.
Leave yourself alone, let your body be,
put down the drugs,
the booze,
the knife and live your life.
Because no matter how far you are down no matter what you think can go wrong.
Remember in this world there's always people around who will miss your smiling face.
No matter what,
remember always
What do you do when the past won't leave you alone?
It haunts you at your door step,
it calls you on the phone.
It tortures the soul and cuts it to shreds.
To know inside that love is truly dead.
To know in your heart that nothing will change,
too many things have gone wrong.
It will always hurt no matter what you do.
Just to know true love.....
was never true.
Those deep blue eyes,
looking,
piercing into my soul.
Searching for every inch of my mind,
looking for every emotion I hide.
Those deep blue eyes that can be so calm,
turn so stormy,
so clouded with pain,
when you see my true emotions.
It must hurt to know that my emotions are hidden to protect you.
Those cloudy blue eyes,
they hide what you feel inside.
But I can always see,
the only worry you have in this world is me.
When we hide what we feel,
we fall apart,
we become distant and so hurt.
So clear those eyes,
and let me see the person those clouded eyes hide from me.
See those tears well up in your eyes,
it breaks my heart every time.
So hard to see the pain inside,
it's in me too.
But you knew that,
didn't you?
I feel the pain you feel,
it burns inside my heart.
Eating away at me like a parasite.
I hope love takes over now.
and kills the pain I feel inside.
Drown out the screaming and the tears.
Heal the love that lingers here.
Rain I am
And I fold myself in
and laid back
into open air
leaving flight
to those
with sunlight
*
*
*
falling
*
*
*
without sound
except for this
tearing of my wings by the wind
resigned to colorless fate
as the sky sheds tears from its
gray embrace and silence
resigned upon my descent.
Today was the day you made me see what a liar you are.
And how you never loved me.
You lead me on.
Confusing my love.
And here I thought you were sent from above.
You never really listened.
Though you said you cared.
But you always comforted me when I was hurt or scared.
Never wanted me to know how you really felt.
You said things to make me melt.
My heart belonged to you before I smartened up.
Your love for me was only a bluff.
You tampered with my emotions you broke my heart.
I now have no where to go.
And don't have a clue where to start.
For the ones who betrayed me i'll never look back......
I never shed pitty and that's
I never planned on loving you,
Of course I never planned you at all,
I never expected you to trip me,
and I didn't expect to accept the fall.
I never knew I could feel this way,
I never knew feelings like this could exist,
I didn't know what hit me, but I'm glad I didn't miss.
I never planned on sharing my life,
I was always one for my own,
living only for myself,
and never for anyone else.
I never thought I needed anyone,
though I was fine all alone,
the unplanned I met you,
and strangely you proved me wrong.
I never planned my life changing,
I always assumed it would remain the same,
I never knew there would be a change
I loved you from the very beginning
I gave you the key to my heart
I hoped you wouldn't break it
but you did, you left me all alone
you really didn't care about me
even though you said you did
you said you were sorry
but it just had to end
I couldn't understand why
but now I think I realize
that you didn't care at all
you didn't really love me
that's why you let me fall
it's been a long time
since we were together
but I still remember it well
when you left me,
part of me died
but I still love you I always shall
even though we are just friends
I don't want to look into your eyes.
You'll just deceive me with your lies.
I don't want to let you into my heart,
You'll just tear it all apart.
I don't want to loo at you and smile,
You'll just make me cry after awhile.
I don't want to say "I love you",
You'll jsut laugh and call me a fool.
I don't want to give you any part of me,
please just leave.....
and let me be.
A Poem From Me To You by mi-alo-hem-va, literature
Literature
A Poem From Me To You
Sitting in my bedroom not knowing what to do,
so I decided to write down all my feelings,
and make it a poem-
from me to you.
Becasue when I'm with you,
I never feel any pain,
all I have to do is see you smile,
and then I'm happy again.
I don't see you every day,
but that's the way it's got to be.
Just knowing that you're there is good enough for me.
You've hugged me when I've cried,
you've helped me through the hardest times,
without even a sigh.
You're alawys on my mind,
no matter what I do,
wherever I go,
whatever I do,
it always leads back to you.
I hope you have enjoyed reading this poeam I wrote for you.
I know it so
Someone I can talk to,
Someone I can trust.
Someone who will be there when my relationships rust.
Someone who will save me,
when everything goes wrong.
Someone who will comfort me and help me to be strong.
Someone who will listen at any time of day.
Someone who will brighten any sky that's gray.
Someone who will always want to be my friend.
Someone who will fight for me,
until the bitter end.
Someone who will cry with me,
whenever I am sad.
Someone who will laugh with me,
whenever I am glad.
Someone who will understand my every weird emotion.
Someone who will always be at my side with their devotion.
Someone who will always
I never asked for the sunshine
I never wanted the rain
I didn't ask for these feelings
And I never wanted the pain.
I never asked for forever
I never wanted your lies
I never asked to be left with these heart-wtenching cries.
I didn't ask for the moon
I never wanted the air
I never asked you to love me
I never asked you to care.
I never wanted to love you
I never wanted to fall
I never wanted to succumb
and give to you my all.
I didn't ask for the world
or for the heavens above
I never asked you for something
but I always longed for your love.
As the moon rose slowly over the forests damp saplings, his heart beat as rapidly as the pace of the drums we had heard in the wild. He didn't sleep soundly only his dreams stirred him from all peace and sanctity as he lay on the floor damp and shivering, frightened of his own shadow. I watched his as if he were a new born, as his legs moved violenly as if he were running away from something, or more like it was life he was running from. No sounds but the deep breaths and the sharp whimpers as he dreamed of the mightmarish place he had been,
His own life.
Once upon a time, in a land far far away.
You and I were an item, why'd you go away?
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
I know what we had isn't dead.
You agree don't you?
I might seem ok, but please stay, stay so you can see, I'm as hurt as can be.
How could you have walked away from me?
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
Won't you come back, save me, take me away with you?
If you see me shake with laughter please don't be fooled,
come a little closer, so you can see the tears in my eyes.
Still there from the day we died......
That day, the day you left me behind.
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
Whatever you do don't find someb
Eight Kisses
One
You can call
it emptiness, breath, epithet, or oblivion
or love, or the thing we can't
touch, while in motion.
The rush
of your mouth in me like icemelt water,
innocent, surging
like a creek,
touching,
stopped.
Current Residence: Montana...yes we do have electricity Favourite genre of music: rock, indie Favourite photographer: Milton H. Greene Operating System: windows XP MP3 player of choice: Archos Shell of choice: humor Wallpaper of choice: Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince book cover Skin of choice: my own, you freak......ewwww. Favourite cartoon character: ummm, I really don't have one unless Beeker from the muppets counts Personal Quote: I like FedEx, It doesn't look like a poop.
Favourite Visual Artist
Gustav Klimt
Favourite Movies
Monty Python And The Holy Grail, Bridget Jones, And any movie that will make me scream.
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Reliant K, Gratitude, My Chemical Romance, The Honorary Title, Fall Out Boy,Oasis, Gin Blossoms
Favourite Writers
J.K. Rowling
Favourite Games
PSO, and mario-old school
Favourite Gaming Platform
X-Box
Tools of the Trade
pen, paper, and wit.
Other Interests
Writing poetry, drawing, music, and band....shut up I hear you laughing.
Ok so I really haven't updated in over a year but alot has happened. I married now. Ryan and I are very happy we are living on campus at Rocky, and it's so wonderful here. I love being on campus it's great to be free. Classes are great, and the music program rocks!!! Our choir is going to Bulgaria and Vienna!!!
The wedding was wonderful, everything went perfectly and I got to have my fairytale wedding, carriage and all. and thank you to you all who came to join us.
Well it's late and I need to do homework so Night all.
Well I haven't been able to write a journal in a very very very long time so I thought I should.
Where to start....well first off I'm officially engaged, ring and all. I'll have to put a picture of the ring up...it's so amazing. Ryan and I just got back from Cali. we were visiting some of his family. I got to meet his Grandparents, and they seemed to like me considering his Grandpa told me he loved me and didn't tell Ryan...(Sorry honey.) Before we got to Mojave we stopped at Cove Fort (A Mormon base) where they tried to convert us.... damn Mormons. Any way
we spent about 4 days in Mojave, and then went off to Sea world which was pretty am